Fox News Launching a Weather Service?

(And More POLITICS News)

Biden's transition team says they plan to disinfect the entire White House after Trump leaves. I wonder where they plan to get that much hydroxychloroquine? Also, here's a fun fact: they've even hired a priest to get rid of Stephen Miller. Merry Christmas everyone!

Quick democracy update. In a massive blow to Trump, the Supreme Court rejected a lawsuit out of Texas that attacked other states' election results. Experts say Trump will take it to an even higher court... Judge Judy.

Listen up, Civil War reenactors. Texas Republican lawmaker Kyle Biedermann says he plans to introduce a "Texit" referendum pushing for the state to secede from the U.S. Well Kyle, I'm interested to see how that works out for you, General-Lee speaking.

This is great. According to sources inside the White House, Trump is offering pardons "like Christmas gifts" to people who haven't even committed any crimes, and at one point said he'd pardon "every person who ever talked to me." Well, I guess Melania won't be getting a pardon. In a related story, "WHAT!? Then why'd I kill myself?" said Jeffrey Epstein's ghost.

Here's something dumb. A controversial New York Times op-ed by Joseph Epstein says First Lady Dr. Jill Biden should drop the "Dr" title next to her name since she's not a medical doctor, and just be "First Lady Jill Biden". Apparently he also wants to change Dr. Dre to First Lady Dre and Dr. Pepper to Third Soda Pepper.

Did you guys catch this? Fox News says they're launching a streaming weather service in 2021 called Fox Weather. Everyday will be cloudy with a chance of socialism. Just don't expect them to admit that black clouds matter. Happy Kwanzaa by the way.