Bezos and Branson's Billionaire Space Race

(And More ENTERTAINMENT News)

In Olympics news, Sha’Carri Richardson has been disqualified from the 100m dash for a positive marijuana test. I don't see how getting *high would even help you in the 100m dash…. now pole vaulters, that's a different story. Weed enthusiasts have already named a new strain after her: Hundred-meter Hash.

In a move many are saying is racist, the Tokyo Olympics has banned swim caps designed for afros, aka the "Soul Cap". Why are they so afraid of that? They should be focused on banning something way worse: the soul patch.

Sorry, Jeff Bezos. Virgin Galactic will send Richard Branson to space just days before Jeff gets there. Historian's say it's one small step for a billionaire, one giant leap for a hundred-billionaire. "I'm not jealous at all," said Jeff Bezos while polishing his new Richard-Branson-seeking missiles.

Did you guys catch this? James Gandolfini's son Michael will soon debut as young Tony in a prequel to The Sopranos called "The Many Saints of Newark". Fans are excited to get an answer on who would win in a fight: Young Tony or Young Sheldon.

Finally, the "Real Doll" company may have struck gold again, by debuting the world's first elderly sex robot, complete with "wrinkles and silver hair". Even better, it's covered through Medicaid. For that extra touch of realism, when you start to have sex with the robot, it goes into cardiac arrest.